i don’t ever have enough for all of you. but collectively Someone does. let’s seek out that Someone.
let’s put each other in the path of healing and nod approval to our fear-busting chops, that we together can fight this pain. this brokenness. this inertia toward unrest.
collectively, WE can be enough for each other. WE need one commonality. WE need LOVE.
you don’t need to know what i believe in to love me, nor i to love you.
we ALL bleed red when oxygen hits, we ALL have blue veins underneath our skin.
we have the most unique pigments to our skin, that scars when it heals, and sweats when it’s too hot.
WE are the SAME bones, with various patterns and layers upon us.
THAT IS IT. please stop telling me that i cannot take care of you because of my differences.
I WANT TO LIVE MY LIFE AS I LOVE MY NEIGHBOR.
alive and without abandon.
let us move beyond the sludge of labels, of greed, of proving something to anyone. let us prove we can love our neighbor as ourselves. let us start by dropping our ‘better than’ labels, and start with the lonely, the orphaned, the needy.
in return for your sacrifice you will be infiltrated with joy. you may try to fight it off. you are just doing the ‘right thing’ you say.
but you aren’t. YOU ARE DOING WHAT COMES BY INSTINCT.
JOY IS JUST THE ADDED BONUS.
you are LIVING. we are MADE to be LIVING TOGETHER, one with each other. that’s why sports games that are nail biters are catalysts for fist bumping. it’s not because we are the actual batter or referee or coach, but we feed off of the energy:
just like church when we raise our hands in worship.
exactly like the sway you start, unknowingly, alongside your favorite crooner, their guts toppling out under pyrotechnics.
mirrored in an art installation that instantly makes you weep, or boil with anger.
public outcry means
we are not de-sensitized like
the Hungry Hippo of They
say we are.
you know why? the THEY is made up of us.
so let’s stop the madness of US verses THEM.
your neighbor. the one who insists that they’re fine, who deals alone with a sick parent, and craves a short respite from the worry.
exhausted, overwhelmed new mom who “should” be happy but can’t seem to stop crying and is afraid she will hurt herself.
frightened young teen who does not know where their next meal will come from from, but thinks hunger will be less painful than remaining in abuse and chooses to run.
our THEY is the collective.
WE have to start taking better care of THEM.
because regardless of our ‘busy’ … man, woman, child … we need EACH OTHER to survive.
busy is bullshit.
LOVE IS LAVISHING.
let’s start living like we mean it.
let’s stop pretending that making our pockets deeper or more fashionable will make our hearts bulletproof to LIFE and it’s CITIZENS.
i may sound angry, but I’m not. I AM JUST WAKING UP TO WHAT MATTERS TO ME.
it’s going to be a tough road of learning, but i’d rather be about YOU and THEY than about me.
i can’t function alone, and i’m guessing that a potluck, party of 1, seems kind of stale.
let’s celebrate THRIVING and dig deeper. i know we can heal us TOGETHER.
party’s at my house.
4 thoughts on “i don’t have enough”
Bravo!!!! Beautiful words, Barbie. Thank you for thinking so deeply and caring so deeply. And sharing it.
I have missed your writing; I’m glad you’re back at it. You’re good. Love you from Mrs F
Sent from my iPhone
You are the best Mrs. F. I love how you encourage me. Thank YOU for reading! 🙂
love you! this is beautiful, my beautiful friend. xo
Love you too friend. Thank you.