random thought thursday:: non hippie edition

photo (1)

i had some braised kale tonight that was honestly better than the mashed potatoes they shared a plate with. insane. and it was the first time i ate kale! i feel like i should be receiving my membership to “Fad Foods of Yesterday”, since kale has been hip FOREVER according to hippies….and yet, i’m a self-proclaimed hippie, and haven’t ever had kale until tonight? what????

note to self: must check and recheck my Hippie Guidelines list.

Said list includes but not limited to: buy reusable bags to use for groceries, forget to use them, buy more, make own deodorant, eat granola, shower every third day…UMMMM, apparently I am not a hippie. newsflash! ūüôā

i kinda already knew that i wasn’t a real hippie, as i have never had any interest in going to, following, or reliving anything to do with the Grateful Dead. besides, Ben Harper and old Dave Matthews are enjoyable without any mood altering substances, and no weird dancing bears are involved. the bears kinda scare me. no offense if Jerry Garcia was your jam, man! he rocked! he just wasn’t my main jam, man. ūüôā

i also must point out that as a psuedo-hippie, i don’t know how to let stuff go with the flow anymore, because frankly, i am not sure which flow i am supposed to follow. or unfollow, or like or friend, or poke, or snap with the chat. GAH. makeitstopsometimes.

i totally and absolutely am on board with technology. IF … we can take a break once in a while, and go swimming (right¬†now in the mitten, we can ski or snowboard, or practice the delicate art of not freezing our asses off – i mean, sorry for swearing but this winter has STUNK as far as temps and snowfall), or macrame a plant holder for our doula. ūüėČ

but, i do advocate loving ALL people. each one of them. no matter what they wear, who they listen to, or what kind of psychedelic bears they find fascinating. so, hippie points earned back. right on man (said with Matthew McConaughey’s voice) AND, thankfully for a.r. and r.l., i do shower daily, because that IS how i roll. except when i’m camping, which is a whole ‘nother post entirely:: hippie in her element. (picture me talking to every animal, because, well, i LOVE every animal, and ALMOST every bug, living thing, etc).

i feel like this type of post is kinda like you getting the backstage pass to the willy wonka land of my brain, and all it’s psuedo/real hippie loving ways. sure i have non hippie confrontational moments, where i need a room filled with pillows so i can thrash about like a weirdly flexible robot, but thankfully those are few and far between. ūüôā don’t you wish we could have a room like that available for when we are about to lose our marbles or kindness, and can just bounce around? it would probably make us laugh and cause fewer accidents on Woodward, right? and then we would bust a gut, hug it out, and share some ice cream in general merriment about being our awesome selves. because kind folks, i believe we are all awesome. so, somebody invent that weird pillow robot flailing room, okay? and SOON. i gots cabin fever, and i gots it B-A-D.

this post brought to you by #41 (which is one of Dave Matthews’ best songs, although my favorite song he ever wrote was the Christmas Song).

peace in whatever or wherever you call home, homies.

your psuedo hippie,


frizzy hippie: volume 2 :: i can’t eat the glue, & what it’s teaching me

link to purchase picture

bobcat pup


in the past half year or so, i’ve gone gluten free. this post is about what i miss (foods), and what <<i’ve discovered>>.

i have not jumped on the bandwagon. but if you need to judge me anyway, go ahead. I (politely) just don’t care anymore what you think about my food choices. ¬†i have been doing it to see if the stomach issues that have plagued my daily life since childhood, would improve – they have.


(i miss fresh bagels)

::: it has been HARD. ¬†i ate gluten a few times on and off since i’ve been trying it. i immediately felt the effects of its return. tummy aches, uncomfortable, lack of energy (boo).

so i’ve made a choice. no more gluten – forever. (only exception, if my Uncle Ron makes Gramma F’s homemade bread, or teaches me how – pretty please?). ūüôā

i have now been gfree since Christmas Day, and i’m never going back. i will not just eat it to please whomever my host or hostess is, and i will just bring my own snacks so i know i have options. this may sound harsh, but it is my HEALTH. no offense to you! ūüôā

::: the removal of something that is in SO much in our food today has been a very difficult task.

difficult because i’ve been trying to lose weight without much change to my routine, and i’m on a budget. remember this?¬†duh Barb, you gotta MOVE more. (goal for 2014).

((i also miss microbrewed beer))

taking out a protein, not because i’m allergic, but obviously because i’ve found, i have an issue with it (as i have felt/looked better immediately after i stopped eating it) has been life changing.

<< i have MORE ENERGY>>  :::::

what i’ve realized is that taking it out of my diet is more than just taking it out for me.¬†it has been an education for everyone that i encounter on a semi-regular basis.

i’m a freshman about the gluten facts.¬†like, did you know that there are some beef jerky brands that contain it? and some cheeses? fascinating.


before i lose you with boring factoids, i want this post to be a goal for all of us.

because, dear folks, not eating gluten seems to me to have been a punishment so far, and i’d love to change that. (this post is about more than gluten i promise). ūüėČ

i feel like because i can’t have a soft breaded sandwich without having to toast my bread beforehand, or eat stuffing at holiday meals, or check every single label, i feel gypped!

there, i said it.

(( i miss inexpensive tasty crackers))  :::  one of the harder things? people are skeptical about why i may be doing it.

or worse?

they make jokes about stuff not being “gluten free” because it is the dieting rage right now.

i’ll be honest, i didn’t research a whole lot before i started, because if i had, i’d never have even tried.

this little protein is added to SO many things to use as a kind of protein “glue” if you will. something about it makes things stick together.

i am all kinds of edumacating you all today, huh? ūüôā


going forward:

i want to not feel gypped. i want to feel JOY now & forever about my health choices, and in general about my choices, such as wearing white after Labor Day, and why Michigan State is the best university in the world.

it also got me thinking that my struggle to want to just be able to eat like my gluten tolerant friends & fam, is a great metaphor for like TONS of things.  life choices. career choices.  Mac or PC.

you see, we cannot always choose why we are the way we are.  we can certainly try to improve on stuff that we struggle with, or dislike about ourselves. i also think it may come down to something even more simple for me.

i want to feel supported in my decisions. whether i decide to become the first woman to climb mount everest with a bobcat pup snuggled into a baby sling, or i want to start the world’s first sustainable lady bug farm. ¬†i want people to ask questions with interest, not doubt. i want people to be curious with compassion, care & tenderness, not scowls and snideness.

isn’t it absurd (and SO joyous) that we are given these lives according to God’s plan for EACH of us, and how we seem to make a hilarious, beautiful messes of it, and how He still loves us anyway?

that rocks!

i believe that God wants us to use encouragement, support, love and understanding to continuously affect the people around you and how their joy is being sought. being shared & multiplied. mine too. we are supposed to be different. we are supposed to eat different stuff. wear different clothes. speak different languages. because God would have been so bored to have a world of only Victoria & David Beckhams. He would have been B-O-R-E-D.

do you know those montages for different things like phone commercials, where they interview or show short clips of people of all races, sizes, religions, sexual orientations, hair color, ages, peanut-butter-choices? and everyone is smiling? those are MY FAVORITE. the beauty of those colors of skin, those hairstyles, those shapes, those smiles – all not perfect, are just SO real.


all of us.

so, the next time someone is telling your their ideology or diet, or plan for financial freedom, or big dream, let them talk. and listen. ¬†REALLY listen. ¬†ask questions with intention of goodness, show them your joy of hearing or interpretting what they mean, as they delve into it. my guess is? you will see the sparkle in their eyes. or feel the energy of their excitement. you may even give them a hug, and a word of encouragement. because they may not know all the answers of what gluten is in, or know how they will climb mount everest and still make sure to feed their bobcat babe when it’s hungry, or even know where to find tiny solar-powered tractors for their ladybug farm. but i’m sure they’d love a friend’s ear to bounce ideas off of. i’m going to take my own advice and let my favorite girl dream out loud, without being the reality police, or worse yet, the dream crusher. i want her to feel the joy of choosing on her own and learning.¬†because through this journey of eating gluten free i’ve learned that i need to extend kindness to those with their own ideas of what works for them.¬†because we all have God’s safety net, and eventually someone will come up with a gluten free version of Buffalo Wild Wing’s chocolate cake, right? ūüôā

i can’t eat the glue, but what i’m gaining in understanding is pretty filling. plus? i can still eat kettle chips, chocolate & coffee with cream (sometimes sugar), so life.is.good.


i don’t always love Beyonce but…

i saw this floating around the interwebs, and wanted to share it here. ¬†because we must be courageous. ¬†everyone probably understands the joy from music, and the healing from laughter. ¬†Check out this woman’s courageous move before a double mastectomy surgery.

the courage and joy she has in these moments is inspiring.

what have you found courage or joy in today?


adventure, adventure :: backpacking in the moonlight

i went backpacking for the first time last fall.
where you wear your food, your clothes, your space to sleep, on your back.
and you set up camp at some lovely place, where the air is fresher than your lungs know what to do with.

at some point on our hike out.

at some point on our hike out.

we went up north in the lower peninsula of michigan, to the hoist lake recreation area.

it was magical. ¬†i don’t have any pictures of walking in, but we walked in around 10 p.m., and it was just stunning. quiet, and peaceful, and coolish with a humid mist.

these two were pumped, as was i.

these two were pumped, as was i.

it was the kind of trip, where the planning is quick, and spur of the moment, and where the excitement of the trip is electric.  we had all the equipment we needed, and just decided to go.  we only had one real night/day to spend up there, and that was all we needed. i love my family.

she was ready to defend me against squeeters.

she was ready to defend me against skeeters.

my love has backpacked his whole life, and a.r. is following in those giant footsteps of his, and is quite the adventurer herself.  i love nature, i love being with my family, and i have definitely camped rustically (no bathroom, no showers, no people around you for a LONG while) before.  but, i had never backpacked.

in the morning, i felt peace.

in the morning, i felt peace.

it was not a very good night of sleep for me, but my sweets both slept amazing. ¬†i was worried i would roll over a.r., and so, couldn’t quite relax. ¬†but, i know if we could’ve stayed at least one more night, i would have been refreshed beyond my own understanding, because just the less than 24 hours that i was up there, i was refreshed.

these beauties were taking a bath close to us in the morning mist.

these beauties were taking a bath close to us in the morning mist.

we had a campfire, and campers food (a.r’s fave) we hiked during the day, we gathered sticks, learned more about our surroundings, and laughed in the wind.

my firemaker.

my firemaker.

we are blessed to have been able to go.


morning coffee ‚ô•

morning coffee ‚ô•

this was our view. we couldn't see another person from our "site".

this was our view. we couldn’t see another person from our “site”.

God's Glory.

God’s Glory.

i beyond a doubt, believe that it was a perfectly orchestrated trip from my Maker to enjoy the end of last summer with my loves before the school year began again for a.r.

it was exactly what we knew we needed.

trifecta of awesomeness.

triangle of awesomeness.

no makeup, no worries.

no makeup, no worries.

it is one of my favorite trips of all time. ¬†i was less healthy than i am now, but that makes me even more excited for this year’s trip!


those two people are my heart.

the people in this picture make me so happy, even if i look like i need a nap, and a makeover! :)

the people in this picture make me so happy, even if i look like i need a nap, and a makeover! ūüôā

goofballs in the woods.

goofballs in the woods!


thank you Lord, for this view.

thank you Lord, for this view.

love is everywhere, you just have to look.

love is everywhere, you just have to look.

i heart wildflowers.

i heart wildflowers.

backpacking is amazing. i am an amateur, but i know if you have any questions about stuff we brought, or what you would need, r.l. would be happy to help you answer those questions.  it is something you should try.  just once.  i promise, you will come away relaxed, refreshed, and more in love with life.


best girl. small frog. favorite.

best girl. small frog. favorite.

only a prince will do.

only a prince will do.

go out and seek adventure. it is a blast. i promise.




we did it! (well, i knew they could do it, but i again, was less healthy then, and this was an accomplishment!). yay!

we did it! (well, i knew they could do it, but i again, was less healthy then, and this was an accomplishment!). yay!


now go find some adventure!!!


confidence can:: laugh. aka: that one time i tried to “do a photoshoot for an outfit post”


hilariously not a fashion blogger.

hilariously not a fashion blogger.

first off, i am faboosh, whether the camera tells me that or not. ¬†(a little confidence can, if you will). ūüôā

this is a dark mistake of a picture of my living room.  it is just the tip of the iceberg that will blow your mind about the upcoming "fashion" post.

this is a dark blurry mistake of a picture of my living room. it is just the tip of the iceberg that will blow your mind about the upcoming “fashion” post.


um…how do fashion bloggers do it? there is a super popular series, well, i’m sure that there are many, many series devoted to this, but i know of what i wore wednesday, by the pleated poppy.

okay. i am not a fashion blogger. in fact, i am not what anyone may call fashionable (at least to the point that someone would ever wear what i wear together, as i wear it). but, instead of cleaning the fridge, grocery shopping, and cleaning my car, i thought i might try something different on this little space. for laughs, if you will.

now, in order to get a good look at what a fashion post is supposed to look like, i suggest my favorites here:

casey from the wiegands

lindsey from the pleated poppy

elsie & emma from a beautiful mess

mary from trusty chucks

carly from this is my story

okay, so do you see a pattern? they all look faboosh, they all have the “i’m cool, without trying to look cool” looks down, they inspire you to dress a little more put together.

umm, thanks instagram for editing out my sweaty, uneven makeup-ed forehead...oh wait...

umm, thanks instagram for editing out my sweaty, uneven makeup-ed forehead…oh wait… :0)

here are my takes:

(also, let it be known that i actually attempted to take some with my digital camera, and a leftover tripod from one of ar’s old christmas gifts a few years back, and then the camera died. and i have NO idea where the cables are to recharge it – this is already turning out great for a fashion shoot).

maybe if i make a funny face, no one will notice that i don't know what i'm doing?

maybe if i make a funny face, no one will notice that i don’t know what i’m doing?

and next up, we have the accessories “close up” shot, that so many before me have perfected:

a little too dark, and also, my hand looks like a limp duck neck.

a little too dark, and also, my hand looks like a plump, weird duck or something.

and next up, we have the “look at my pedicure/manicure that is so cute!” shot that i failed on epic proportions at:

one foot wonder.

one foot wonder.

and then, both feet:

please do not pay close attention to the details of this pedicure.  a 3 year old could have done a better job.

please do not pay close attention to the details of this pedicure. a 3 year old could have done a better job.

and then, you will not even know how to contain your jealousy at the next shot…

wait for it…


i like to call this one fashion dancer.

i like to call this one fashion dancer.

semi normal shot of the side of my head/my scrappy fabric headband thing.

semi normal shot of the side of my head/my scrappy fabric headband thing.

there were a few that i liked, but, alas, i am not a fashion blogger, unless wrists are what you are after:

boom. blew. your. mind.

boom. blew. your. mind.

so all in all, i think i will leave it to the pros, and just keep using pictures of other people, and nature. and gus the guinea pig.  because i am not afraid to say i am bad at something.

fashion blogging is something i am bad at. also, please don’t take this as me making fun of people that can do these. ¬†i am jealous, and also want folks out there to know that the ones that look awesome, who have rad edited photos, and can look cute while doing it all? ¬†kudos to you, and this stuff is hard, and takes so much time!!! my headband is off to you.

have a lovely day my friends, and i hope this post at least made you laugh. ps. my watch is from tarjay. it is this one.


pleated poppy

snippets of summer


enjoying life.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAsmelling the flowers as much as possible.

2013-05-26_15-26-55_826being asked to “drive” the Jeep off road out of a HUGE, DEEP, MUDDY hole…

2013-05-26_15-26-40_79this angle does it no justice!  i got us out though, stellar off-roader that i pretend to be.

2013-05-25_09-38-54_665enjoying the sunshine on this beauty’s face as much as i possibly can (and that little furry nugget too).

2013-05-25_19-01-02_698a little of this…

2013-05-26_16-20-37_382a smidge of this…

getting my first final grade (an A!) for my new path. ūüôāyay

 doing lots of this for homework:

2013-06-30_20-50-51_772¬†knowing that this isn’t perfect, but that i’m trying my best.

2013-05-28_16-46-13_672learning about different ways that this is art, and how i need to relax about it.

2013-06-03_17-42-45_557enjoying a lot of this


2013-06-28_12-50-13_527this and

IMG_20130513_100241there is quite a bit of my homerun hitter thrown in, which makes my heart SO happy


and of course there’s always, ALWAYS room for this guy:

2012-07-22_20-51-06_765 (1)and of course some of this goodness too

but no summer would be complete without a lot of this:

2013-06-27_15-41-37_237but, in my humble opinion, due to our rainy mitten weather this year, i haven’t had enough of these to enjoy (hint, hint, Big Guy ūüėČ )

2013-07-05_21-28-17_5and i can’t wait to use this to keep pop and vino cool, especially since my rl made it for me (it was my grandparents’) :



this guy and i agree, it has been an amazing summer so far, and i’m so pumped for the rest of it! may your days be filled with the glory of His masterpieces

IMG_20130624_195844and may you always


please… enjoy it!


the thing about life is, it can be stressful.  it can be downright unfair.  it can be sickish, and dirty, and grumpy, and disgusting, and mean.

BUT…sometimes it can be fun.¬† it can be light.¬† it can be hilarious, and lovely, and comforting, right down to the joy at getting some new awesome mittens.

take it from this viking with a HUGE heart … today, take a moment to find something small, something great, something lovely, and enjoy it!

random thought thursday:: rodent retirement homes

i have not written.
i have not wanted to write.
i have not wanted anything but to be left alone.
and that is hard to type out since i know it’s us that makes me better.

me + you  = better.

i have had a change in perspective. not huge, not overly dramatic.

just that, in order for me to be the best be forever lovely writer that i may be, i need you.  and music.  and NO chipmunks.

i need your voices, your concerns, your funny, silly jokes.

your comments light my way.

i need pointless questionnaires (that really aren’t pointless, because i get to know you more).¬† fill out a few, and send me them, okay?

i need community. just good old-looking out for each other community.

who doesn’t?

so here’s where i’m at:

1.¬† i think that growing food is super awesome.¬† i don’t know how organic farmers do it.¬† my pepper plants are eaten but by critters, not me (it saddens me that rl’s jalapenos are caput thus far, he so enjoyed them).¬† my tomatoes are infected.¬† i literally cried over my garden.¬† yep, i’m that girl.¬† and, i don’t care!¬† i love my garden, and i want it to flourish!¬† any tips?¬† garlic cloves are in place.¬† chicken coop wire is up (although i do need to create the other garden box one, that may help).

2.¬† i think all chipmunks should die¬† should go to a chipmunk retirement home. they are evil¬† annoying little rodents who kill gardens and joy. particularly mine. and i’ve saved two from drowning (in a homemade chipmunk trap).¬† but for goodness sakes – please spay and neuter your chipmunks!

3.¬† i believe lily-white legs are the new thing. like never-see-the-sun-unless-it’s-africa-hot-outside white. i rock them out often.¬† just sayin.

4.¬† i still don’t have all the answers, but i’m trying like hellobeautiful to find them out.

summer skirt+fun heels+lawn seats+sisters = happiness

5.¬† concerts save me.¬† music is my lifeblood.¬† in this here and now, before the eternal question of my resting place, i like to shake my booty, and bop my head.¬† not only did i get to see sarah mclachlan with my two sisters (better than mint bear claw ice cream, and that’s tough to do), but i am going to ben harper in september.¬† what?¬† my favorite?¬† yes.¬† his voice fills my crackly soul with goodness and hope.

6.¬† my posts don’t all have to change the world, and i don’t need to worry if one or two or 500 people don’t like them.¬† i am the writer.¬† i am a writer.¬† it feels really good to realize that.

7.¬† i can’t WAIT to watch alex reese and her sweet pals play ball this weekend!¬† bring on the cheering and home runs!¬† go Gatorcats!

8.¬† there is nothing as soothing as a friend’s voice, and more awesome is her laughter.¬† thank you my sweet kate.

9.  i will soon be the proud owner of 1/4 of a cow.  will you please send along recipes that are somewhat healthy? stews, burgers, etc.

10.¬† i have a goal of my craft room/creative space that i’m now calling the be room, to be fully functional by august 1st.¬† wish me free time.¬† etsy should be up and running by september 1st.¬† wish me prayers and good luck, and buddha belly rubs all around.¬† and most importantly – COURAGE.

orange makes me VERY happy!

11.¬† and to end on an odd note, let’s pick b sharp.

stay LOVELY my friends,


copper connector, railroad conductor

i¬†am not sure what the path that God has chosen for me except that somehow i’m a connector.

love more

i am the railroad conductor.

child, sister, mediator. long term-er.

connector.  like a copper wire of sorts, weaving my way around, making sure the electricity is on between folks.

i utilize this copper with a sense of urgency, then, restraint.

i¬†rearrange this metal hoop, with which, i cannot jump through without affecting another human, someone’s child,- perhaps, someone’s aunt.

should i make stuff to sell on etsy?

move closer to alex, get a new job, a new home?

remain¬†in tact at a job that i’m slowly building confidence and regard to usefulness?¬† make paintings of my poetry, hoping to gain extra income to stash away for blue bears farm?

i¬†know that i¬†will not stop dreaming and believing in this blog.¬† a blog that has been a dream for over two years, that i¬†don’t update nearly enough, and that i obsess over & OVER¬†who reads and follows and likes.

i¬†know that i¬†am not the same kind of dreamer you are.¬† we don’t work the same or react anything alike.¬† i don’t like photos of myself, and barely know how to keep a home running.

but i love.

with all my heart.  every single minute.  the people and breathing living things around me.

they feel it.  i know they do.  even when i feel guilty for calling a friend at exactly the wrong time every.single.time.  they know at least i thought of them.

and i break.¬† a lot…my compass of what’s right, and what’s too much to say or worry about is often in the shop.¬†¬† BUT…

i¬†know i¬†can make this blog work.¬† somehow it will generate interest enough.¬† it will liken someone to know how to be¬†nicer.¬† more sensitive.¬† laugh louder.¬† eat more bread. (y’all know i’m¬†a carbsLOVER, right?).¬† maybe someone thinks i’m kooky for laying this all out there.

but me?¬† i’m¬†only doing what i¬†think is right.¬†¬† a connector of worlds.¬† step-mamas, singles, marrieds, old, young, cranky, hippy, artsty,¬†muscially¬†inclined to fall in love, ¬†sportsy, overweight, undervalued, book worm, sassypants, bike riding, motorcycle passengering, river fishing, middle of the long road, different path taken people.

i believe i have the power to connect them all.

diy life

1. be born.

2. make it through middle/high/elementary life while being awkward.

3. discover your path does not align with “well, on paper it’s perfect”.

4. realize that this is exactly where¬†& when you’re supposed to be((hear))

5. fall down, fail, get tragically uninspired by comparison to your-friends-peers-others.

6. realize that you hate this path, pray, choose another.

7. understand that what you thought you would be at age 3/11/18/21 will always change based upon changes around you.

8. realize that life happens.  your problems are more or less the same as others, except there are worse, & there are more/less.

9. surround yourself with love, laughter, & the occasional drink. repeat.

10. hold babies & loved ones as if it’s the last. especially repeat.

11. realize that even though your parents may not understand or appreciate your path, all they really want is for you to be happy, because, they are wonderful people. & they love you to the moon. same with your siblings.

12. fall in love.

13. fall out of love >> cry at rdiculous movies that are not real life. << repeat

14.¬†buy new “you” clothes.¬† << repeat

15. eat ice cream. repeat, especially in place of dinner(sometimes).

16. work hard, & do not understand why. then understand that life is not recess all the time.

17. be irresponsible. learn. repeat.

18. make others proud.

19. make yourself proud. repeat.

20. dance. in the rain, in sweaty ridiculous clothes, at weddings, on the street, in your unders.

21. find love, real love. accept it, cherish it, show it to others.

22. make mistakes. forgive yourself.

23. learn.¬†¬†(bike riding, monopoly¬†& experiencing softball through a¬†girls’ eyes¬†help).

24. understand love/be kind to animals.

25. meet expectations while demolishing expectations.

26. create. make messes, repeat, beat yourself up, learn, heal, create. repeat.

27. FAIL.  fail again, and again, and again.

28. learn.

29. read. lots, read lots¬†& lots. the classics, the mags, whatever makes you wonder. don’t forget #5 & then #26.

30. discover that friendships will sway, & bend, & melt, & become stronger through lapses of time, & space & the elusive cheap airplane ticket.

31. take pictures, write¬†vague and¬†meaningful¬†statuses, upload, download, load¬†& reload music. don’t take yourself too seriously.

32. listen. to everyone & everything. toss salt.

33. try to understand that this life is yours, & yours alone, & as long as you are always striving to be happy, spread love(not hurt), & keep the right view of grace in tact, you will be okay.

you will be okay. you will be okay.